Raising a Child of Freethought
Dateline: August 30, 2000
"RAISING A CHILD OF FREETHOUGHT" > Page 1 , 2 , 3 , 4
The Later Years
It is important to recall this experience with Santa Claus, because only a few years later, a similar experience in cognitive dissonance led to my son becoming a truly independent thinker, and indeed an atheist.
I have never been a fan of fundamentalism, and I had always considered that my faith as a Christian could be successfully reconciled with scientific knowledge. Further, I had always taught my son this, exposing him from the very first to current scientific knowledge, including the theories of the Big Bang and evolution.
As we moved into my son's middle school years, things began to change at our church. The Sunday School materials from the Southern Baptist Convention started to include more material concerning creationism and pointing out what the writers saw as a link between Darwin's theory and the decline in moral values. My son wished to defend the value of science, and came in for some negative experiences from his peers and his teachers. After a period of this, he told me that he'd prefer not to go to Sunday School.
Some time later, in conversations with him, I began wondering if he was still a believer. I started some exploratory talks with him on the subject, and it certainly sounded like he was not. At the time, I only stated my concern, and told him that I would not agree with him if he decided to disbelieve. I handled this disagreement in the same manner that I had handled the political discussion many years earlier - in as matter-of-fact and calm a manner as I could.
Investigating the Issue
I have to admit that I was at that time in the middle of a crisis of faith on my own account. With the added stress of this conversation, I felt impelled to look into the question more closely. It was important to me to help my son explore this issue as fully as possible.
With this in mind, on one of our frequent visits to our favorite book store, I found and purchased a copy of "Atheism: The Case Against God," by George Smith. I decided to read it first, because I had spent 20 years paying attention almost exclusively to the "For God" side, and I felt it was time to look in detail at what the other side had.
As I read the book, I found that the logic as it was presented was compelling to me, and I finally decided that I could no longer consider myself a Christian. I switched (temporarily) to Deism. At the same time, I decided to talk with my son. I told him that his decision concerning religion was completely up to him, and that I supported any choice he would make. I also let him borrow the book, which I thought would go a long way toward helping him clear up his thought processes.
My main concern was that he learn to put his beliefs on a more factual, logical basis, rather than an emotional one. I had long ago learned that allowing yourself to be blown around by the winds of your emotions is a tumultuous way to live.
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