Summary
Title: Healing Violent Men: A Model for Christian Communities
Author: David J. Livingston
Publisher: Fortress Press
ISBN: 0800632516
Pro:
• Offers insight into why men commit violence against intimate partners
• Offers insight into how Christianity has failed to help women being abused
Con:
• None
Description:
• Explores why men commit violence against women
• Explains how and why Christianity has abetted male violence
• Offers ways for Christian communities to address male violence
Book Review
This is the goal of David J. Livingston’s book Healing Violent Men: A Model for Christian Communities. Livingston takes domestic violence very seriously — just as serious as any other form of physical torture, which is what physical abuse amounts to. An assistant professor of religious studies at Mercyhurst College, he pulls no punches in identifying ways in which Christianity has not only failed women, but actually has made things worse for them.
He is, however, optimistic — he doesn’t think that the current situation must persist. Drawing upon his own clinical experience in counseling abusive men, he offers religious leaders possible solutions for addressing issues of violence and battery among parishioners.
So how has Christianity served to abet the abuse of women? An important factor can be found in how churches have traditionally regarded the institution of marriage itself. The ideal of marriage as something which should continue no matter what happens has worked to the detriment of women. Wives are told by their religious leaders that they must endure whatever their husband does. Their vows were, after all, “for better or for worse.”
Livingston cites a 1982 Church Response Survey in which clergy were asked how they would respond in various scenarios of domestic violence. One-third responded that the abuse would have to be very severe for them to recommend the couple separate and twenty-six percent that:
- “...a wife should submit to her husband and trust that God would honor her action by either stopping the abuse or giving her the strength to endure it.”
More interesting is Livingston’s explication of how the Old Testament offers a model for marriage in the relationship between God and Israel, particularly in the book of Hosea. When Israel is beaten, it is a punishment which is deserved, and Israel must endure it as a condition for reunion with God:
- “Marriage and even rape are thus used, in the Book of Hosea, as in Ezekiel and Jeremiah, as metaphors for the relationship between God and God’s people. The appropriate response to infidelity is chastisement and punishment. Marriage is twisted into a symbolic medium through which the cultural expectation of reunion and obedience is delivered to the Israelites.”
For Livingston, the solution is obviously to rethink the nature of marriage and the use of community activism to protect women. More importantly, perhaps, is the admonition not to demonize the men involved:
- “I do not wish to minimize the horror of many women’s experiences of marital rape and ongoing beatings, but I wish here to focus attention on the “normalcy” or routine occurrence of intimate violence, which is perpetuated by average men in rural communities, small towns, and large cities every day.”
- “If we allow the phenomenon to become an “unthinkable crime,” one committed only by “monsters,” we demonize the men. By demonizing them, we allow ourselves to avoid the reality of just how common intimate violence is an how often it is hidden from our sight by the privacy of the home.”
Demonization allows people to imagine that violence is a product of sickness or hatred which doesn’t touch them. In fact, such violence is the product of much more mundane circumstances which touch us all — low self-esteem, the need for control, the desire to achieve justice, and of course fear.
Livingston’s book is a interesting psychological and sociological analysis of domestic violence and the role which religion has played. Although much of his focus is on the ways in which Christianity has failed to stop the violence, he also spends time dealing with domestic violence as a general issue and suggesting possible solutions for religious leaders. It will certainly interest those involved with domestic violence counseling and clergy hoping to better help their community, but others who would like to learn more about the relationship between violence and religion will also benefit.
