Atheism, Holidays and Rituals: Questions, Problems, Advice
It might seem obvious to say that if you no longer adhere to a particular religion, and in fact even regard the entire system to be a mass of superstition, then it would logically follow that you would also not observe the relevant holidays. Some atheists do take this position, but I think that the matter is a bit more complicated. Many, albeit not all, religious holidays are a great deal more on both the individual and the social levels than simply acknowledging religious beliefs.
Holidays can serve to form a connection to your own past by evoking memories of past celebration. Holidays can form and reinforce connections with the friends and family with whom you celebrate. Holiday events can also create connections across an entire society as people develop parallel experiences which forge subtle bonds. Rituals and celebrations, as long as they are not empty of personal meaning, can be worth preserving.
Holidays can serve to form a connection to your own past by evoking memories of past celebration. Holidays can form and reinforce connections with the friends and family with whom you celebrate. Holiday events can also create connections across an entire society as people develop parallel experiences which forge subtle bonds.
A core issue which will influence all others is whether or not those around you know of your unbelief. If they do, then they will be aware of the fact that you may feel uninterested in the more religious aspects to the holiday season. But if they do not realize that you are an atheist, it will become more difficult to assert yourself in any fashion and resist social pressure to conform.
Perhaps the biggest loss in not attending religious ceremonies at a church and not participating in religion-themed rituals is the loss of joint family activities and the diminishing of a family tradition. If this bothers you and others in your family, you should entertain the possibility of developing some substitute activities and starting some new traditions.
A common tradition among many religions is to say some sort of thanks to their god for the food which people eat. As with participation in holiday services at churches, people who might otherwise never bother with "saying grace" the rest of the year can suddenly feel the urge to do so during the holidays in front of the rest of the family.
Should you participate in acknowledging, much less celebrating, any aspect of a religious holiday? If a holiday has no other aspects to it but religion and religious ritual, there are few opportunities for atheists to participate. In such cases, if you do participate, it will likely be because some other factor like family unity weighs more heavily than does the principle of avoiding religion.
A question which faces many atheists is whether or not they should avoid prevalent religious holidays and instead adopt their own holidays. One method would be to develop new, uniquely atheist or humanist holidays - for example a celebration of historical developments in freethought.
So, the way in which an atheist might best approach the question of religious holidays and the creation of new atheist holidays is to ask: What might this mean to me? Are you going to let Christians "win" by allowing them to decide what holidays like Christmas mean to everyone else, or are you willing to stand up and decide what it means for yourself?
