Ban Godless Marriages

Opponents of gay marriage are largely motivated by their firm belief that such unions are displeasing to God and that only divinely-approved marriages should be permitted. How long will it be, however, before they start fighting for other kinds of limits on civil marriages based upon their beliefs about what their god wants?

Micah Holmquist writes:

[W]e are opposed to sodomites getting “married” because homosexual activities are an abomination to God! It is not, however, the only thing that offends God. Read your Bible and you will see that sex is only to be between two people united by Holy Matrimony. ("For it is only when people get married that they should start to have sexual thoughts,” the Good Book should say.) Think of all the Godless people who are allowed to have sex and then get married. We should not allow this, and yet we do.

The solution to this problem is quite simple. ... We need an amendment that forces all Americans and people living in America to declare whether or not they are a Bible believing and practicing Christian before they begin to have sexual thoughts. Any person who declines to make this declaration should be prevented from ever having sex through castration or female genital mutilation.

We need an amendment that creates a national sodomy law, by which I mean it bans all sex that God doesn’t like. This of course will ban the sexual sin of masturbation. Any sodomite found guilty of sodomy should be executed. ... This amendment should also ban Judges and others from performing marriages. Marriages should only be performed by male ministers (a ban on satanic religions and civil rights and equal protection laws will be accomplished in another amendment) and should only be used to unite a man and a woman, both of whom are alive and have their genitalia. Married couples will “be fruitful and multiply” because all forms contraception will be prohibited and treated the same as sodomy.

Some misguided people will no doubt claim that this amendment would abridge the freedom of Americas, but nothing could be further from the truth. No less a source than President George W. Bush has said, “we received our rights from God.” If this is true, and it is because the Declaration of Independence tells me so, how then can people have a “right” to do things that are displeasing to God?

The answer is that no “right” to evil exists. “Does the God we worship promote worldwide abortion, homosexuality, fornication (distributing condoms even to children!), pornography...?” Dr. Richard H. Strand has said on the Radio Liberty website. “He allows wicked leaders to sponsor such things, but they are certainly not things that He wants. He surely wants Christians to stop those evil things in a country where the people elect their own rulers.”

Hey, don’t worry, that’s all just satire. No one really advocates such nonsense. Right?

Right?

Read More:

• Gay Rights, Gay Marriage
• Evangelical Christianity & Homosexuality
• Catholicism & Homosexuality