It's not unusual for me to get emails from people who say that they intend to pray for me — but as often as I hear such things, I continue to have trouble understanding why people would do so and, if they must pray, why they would feel the need to tell me about it. Neither seems to make much sense. What makes more sense is if the announcement is really a way of insulting you while still pretending to take the moral high ground.
I was once told (as I've been told many times), that I would be prayed for. I didn't make any snide remarks. I ignored the comment. One month later, I returned to the blog of the person who left that comment and asked if they still set aside a few seconds for my benighted soul.
They didn't even remember who I was.
[original post]
Why am I not surprised that they didn't remember Bachalon? Saying "I'll pray for you" surely wasn't intended to say that the person would, you know, actually do any serious praying. As in so many other situations which so many atheists have had to endure, it was more about saying "you're wrong and I'm not going to bother trying to explain why, so I'll just run from this conversation in a way that makes me look like the bigger person." At least, that's a more generous interpretation than "I'm telling daddy on you."


“At least, that’s a more generous interpretation than “I’m telling daddy on you.”"
LOL.
Yes, but that’s probably at least as viable an interpretation. Congrats to Bachalon for a nice experiment for which the answer is obvious, but revealing nonetheless.
When I hear it these days, it usually seems to be code for “I have no arguments left, and I’d really like to pop you in the snout, but I’m not supposed to, so instead I’m going to attempt to sound morally superior”. I have never had the impression that any actual praying ever took place, but I am very used to being lied to by theists.
When I was in secondary school, I had a Catholic friend who did regularly pray for me; he would tell me about it afterward as well as before, so I believe he really did it; further, he would say that he would do it at times that didn’t always coincide with “I dislike what you’re saying”; often he seemed motivated by genuine concern for me, so I accepted it in the spirit in which he seemed to intend it – he was devoting some of his time to asking God (in whom he really believed) to especially look out for me. While it was all nonsense to me, I felt it was sweet of him to care, and I generally just said thanks when I gave any response.
I have almost never had the same sense that any degree of concern was involved apart from with that one person.
If that person’s introspection or babbling aloud to the non-existent sky king makes THEM feel better, let ‘em rant. Makes not one whit of difference to me.
The first time I heard the response, “And I’ll think for you” to “I’ll pray for you,” I thought it couldn’t be topped. Then I heard someone quote something I think they said they saw on Dawkin’s site: “will you also sacrifice a goat for me?”
And I think so far, that takes the prize.
While I’ve used the retort “And I’ll think for you” I’ve also been known to call the prayer giver on the spot.
“When? When will you pray for me?”
“Don’t you need to know my name and address?”
“How much time are you willing to spend on prayers for me?”
“Why not now? If my immortal soul is in such danger, why are you waiting, Am I not worthy?”
“Will you get back to me on any responses you get from the big guy?”
And I’ll sometimes wind up with “Thank you for using your telepathic powers for good instead of evil.”
I don’t care about prayer away from my presence. In a way it is a compliment. The problem comes when prayer is used for bullying. Then, I suppose the best thing would be to do some bullying prayer back…like praying for the Christian so stop being such a phony.
When asking, “What will you pray for, specifically,” I usually get a response (explicitly or implicitly) to the effect of “For god to open your eyes so you can see the truth…”
Wait, what?
If god was in the habit of intervening to change my opinions, then why the hell hasn’t he done so already? It sure is nice of these believers to give god the permission that he apparently needs to save my soul from his own special brand of eternal torture…
I encourage theists to pray for me. It consumes time that they might otherwise be spent on effective activity.
For similar reason, whenever someone offers me religious literature, I always take as much as they will give me. Then I throw it away.
First of all, no I won’t sacrifice a goat for you or a sheep! The only scrifice to be made for all of mankind was made more than 2000 years ago. Jesus, the Son of God, was not then or now or ever dependant on any one believing in Him to make Him King of Kings. Should I say I will pray for you will not mean that I have no other arguments, it will say that arguing never gets anyone anywhere. I have seen prayer and its results. We can’t see oxygen, does that mean it does not exist, of course not. We have faith it is there to breath. Believing in some one bigger then our little world takes faith, too. We all have faith, the Bible says so, we have faith in ourselves, those we love and that tomorrow will come. Where do you get your faith?????? That is the question? What would you really do if you knew you only had a day left to live? If I say I will pray for you, I am not telling “Daddy” anything He doesn’t already know. Being a loving “Daddy” He wants you to know Him.
The only scrifice to be made for all of mankind was made more than 2000 years ago.
Oh, good. Then we’ve evolved past the need for such primitive behaviors, right?
I have seen prayer and its results. We can’t see oxygen, does that mean it does not exist, of course not. We have faith it is there to breath.
Evidence isn’t just about sight, Terri. We have evidence that air exists… the same cannot be said about the effectiveness of prayer (as a matter of fact, I believe Austin covered this) or even the existence of your god.
What you are trying to do here, Terri, is confuse religious faith (belief without evidence) with everyday “faith” (hope and belief in people or events that have little to no bearing on immediate matters).
If I say I will pray for you, I am not telling “Daddy” anything He doesn’t already know. Being a loving “Daddy” He wants you to know Him.
It’s interesting that you say this, Terri. If God knows everything, why pray? What’s the point of telling him something he already knows? As Austin said, if you have to pray, why do you feel the need to tell us about it, if not to take the “moral high ground”?
I usually say “Pray all you want, you won’t get me. Re not being able to see oxygen, in this case I say “Hold your breath for 10 minutes and get back to me on that.”
When it comes to disagreement about God’s existence, it’s condescending, arrogant, and ignorant to tell someone that they will be prayed for, because the assertion that one needs it is unfounded, which is the root of the disagreement to begin with.
For those who haven’t read it, check out Dan Dennett’s letter written while in the hospital entitled Thank Goodness. He articulates this theme wonderfully.
It’s more precious to think about someone than it is to pray for them (although, comically, it’s the same thing). We have a short amount of time to be alive, and concentrating one’s thoughts on someone else is a one-way gift. Praying merely masks the sincerity.
I will pray for you, because I love you
Hey dude, I get what u mean about the whole praying thing.
We’ve talked about it in my church history classes. The idea is to provide a sense of caring(assuming it is genuinely coming from the heart.) The Bible says to do good deeds in private, basically equal to not boasting. I’ve read some of you’re other posts. Many of the Bible’s teachings are common sense and decent behavior. So, don’t you think you should give it a try? Always looking for other opinions.
And even more are not.
Why do you assume I haven’t?